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May 8, 2018

Senior Citizen Invents Naughty Toy with Dual Action Polisher

Call it American ingenuity, this week a senior citizen in Florida received accolades for her unusual invention: A sex toy converted out of a dual action polisher.The geriatric inventor says she was inspired to do the project when she was going through some old belongings of her deceased husband, who happened to be a car enthusiast.“One of my girlfriends recognized the machine and told me it was a dual action polisher. I had no idea what that was, but I said:

“I bet I can turn that into a dual action something else!”

And that she did. When the rumors first surfaced about this grandmother’s invention, nobody could believe it because of her age. But the elderly inventor swears that sex lives in retirement communities are alive and well, thanks to recent medical advances.She says even though she doesn’t live in a retirement community yet, she likes to visit them to mingle. “At my age, you meet someone, you hit it off for a little while, and then they die. That’s why I have to keep meeting new people.” When asked how she was able to convert a dual action polisher into a sex toy, she responded:

“All it took was a couple a rubber bands, some duct tape, and a whole lot of lollipops.”

Now that she’s patented her invention, the venerable inventor says she plans on promoting it in retirement communities throughout the United States. For the record, she converted an Ultima Random Orbital Polisher to make her invention.

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